Ode to a face

I get gamma knife radio surgery tomorrow. Stereotactic something or another. On the tumor that said “stable” on report after report. But then, a conscientious neurosurgeon, dare I say, a friend, cared enough to look, then look again. “I hate to say this, but it looks…fuller,” he said and he leaned back and pulled his […]

Anatomy of a Run

Anxiety and fear, they can be gripping. They cause a weight that makes the act of getting up off the couch an act of force and willpower that is hard to muster. My day started with worry for someone I love very much. Then it shifted to frustration at an unfair world. Then it shifted to […]

In defense of trying: redefining thriving for a new body

I figured something out about myself. I’ve stayed, in a way, frozen to a version of myself. I used to think I was stuck in a protracted childhood because my tumor caused me to regress, but then I was like, mehhhhhhhh, that sounds like a lot of psychoanalytical pucky. But I knew I was stuck. […]

Update scmupdate

Many, many people showed up for me during my recent surgery, through messages, sharing joy, holding my hand, or sending love in various ways. Before I answer any nagging questions that tear at your gut or mine, I feel compelled to say thank you. From the very depths of my heart, so many have done […]

“Samira eats her words day”

Today was supposed to be the day that the doctors used their most accurate test to prove me wrong. I think it’s called a radio nuclear cisternogram. They were going to put a scary needle in my back, fill me with some kind of magical, radio-active, glow in the dark potion, and track my CSF. […]

What happened

While social media tends to fill in the gaps of the big moments of our lives a few people have asked what happened so I figured I could write it down here for you. Here’s what happened: I woke up January 8th with a tinge of nausea and a not quite rested head. I washed […]