I’m goddamn f&%king miserable

I guess life is about expectations. If you set yourself up for success or failure by believing a certain outcome is imminent, if it doesn’t turn out how you anticipated you end up, well – disappointed. That’s why hope is such a dangerous thing. A beautiful thing, but a dangerous thing.  Usually when you start […]

The Whole Damn Thing

I’ve been in a foul mood. I’ll admit that. Until now I’ve been unwilling to admit why. I act like it’s because I am an unwitting victim of a brain tumor and that the universe is out to get me. I don’t really believe that, and that’s not really why, and I really figured that […]

The calm before the storm

It’s been a while since I have written because I’ve been on self-inflicted radio silence so that I can focus my energies on my upcoming comprehensive exams, arguably the greatest test in getting a PhD, and  a test that had I  done my research and known existed may have deterred me from this particular career […]

Pain pain go away, come again another….never

They say pain is what makes us stronger. It teaches us. Pushes us. Forces is to grow. What does that mean? Is it true that to appreciate the amazing moments we need to see the horrible ones? That to see beauty we must understand what it is to see what is ugly? Is it physical […]

Blame this post on excessive amounts of feminist theory….

I’ve found a trend in my writing about letting go of control, and I suppose I thought that meant being totally fine in the face of whatever shit hit me directly in the face. Taking my face-shit contact with a smile. Ta da! There’s that shining good attitude. What I’m realizing now is the grief, […]