Blame this post on excessive amounts of feminist theory….

I’ve found a trend in my writing about letting go of control, and I suppose I thought that meant being totally fine in the face of whatever shit hit me directly in the face. Taking my face-shit contact with a smile. Ta da! There’s that shining good attitude. What I’m realizing now is the grief, […]

Counting

Anyone who has kept up with this blog regularly knows that my life is in a perpetual countdown mode. A countdown to surgery, a countdown to recovery, waiting for appointments, counting how many hearing tests, counting how many MRIs, counting stitches, counting inches of the scar, counting hours until my next pain killer dose, counting […]

“The only way of knowing a person is to love them without hope.”

I was working on a paper last night and I found that quote as I pored through the works of Walter Benjamin, trying to understand memory, love, images, hope. I still don’t understand but I found this quote very powerful. You see this weekend I found myself crumbling under the weight of the unconditional love […]

Smell Ya Later, Herbert!

The toilets in my house are really clean. Like seriously clean. Eat off me, rest your cheek on my seat clean. Disinfected, gloriously shiny and smelling like the janitor just came through clean. Why? because I cleaned them. Because it was mindless. Because it didn’t involve facing anything. I can’t face it. I can’t face […]

Stuck on the wrong side of a rom-com ending

You know those perfect romantic comedies. You know the one’s right? The story where two people meet and it’s kismet, instant connection, sharp wit and endless hijinks. The couple is invariably torn apart by a stupid friend, a drunken mistake or a disastrous bout of physical comedy induced accidents. In the end they always find […]