I haven’t known what to say here since my comprehensive exams ended. I made it through the written portion and I defend this monster on Wednesday, so I guess I’ve been preoccupied. Plus I’m getting married and while I am less concerned with the wedding than the marriage I see this as a day where […]
It’s been a while since I have written because I’ve been on self-inflicted radio silence so that I can focus my energies on my upcoming comprehensive exams, arguably the greatest test in getting a PhD, and a test that had I done my research and known existed may have deterred me from this particular career […]
I’m working on a small project, my dissertation (NBD) and it focuses on how we make meaning online. How we negotiate things that aren’t generated online and don’t live exclusively online using the tools and affordances of this particular medium. I’m interested in this because it is the affordances of this technology among others that […]
It’s a great whirlwind, navigating the medical system, seeing doctor after doctor, attempting to figure out who it is to trust, what voice has real reason, who knows what’s right from wrong. This whirlwind sucks you in, it fools you, masquerades around you, rushes through you bringing a chill to your bones. With every step […]
This time last year, on a Saturday, I had a party. Really the only party I’ve ever hosted in my own home, it was a momentous occasion for me. I finally got to trim flowers and use serving trays. It only took a brain tumor for me to finally do what I always wanted, wear […]
In life, we bicker, take ourselves too seriously and lose perspective often. Even when we’re at our most positive, someone triggering our pet peeves can light a fire under us, a fire that burns a little too hot too quickly. We misunderstand one another and don’t take time to listen. We are impatient with one […]
I’ve never considered myself chained to medicine, or addicted, or dependent. It’s not that I am opposed to medicine, someone in my position doesn’t have the luxury of being opposed to a tangible necessity in my life. That being said, I’ve always, however foolishly, considered myself one of those people who can make it on […]
There’s a certain rhythm to chronic pain. It vacillates in a certain way. A moment of relief. A rush of intensity. The booming of the throbbing. Dum. Dum. Dum. Dum. It fits with the ringing in my ears that comes in and out, gets louder and quieter depending on my surroundings. Swish, ring, swish, ring, […]
It’s always when I’m at my crabbiest when something good happens but also I seem to be at my chipperest when not so good things happen. Hmmm. I should maybe try to be a crabby curmudgeon all the time… A couple of weeks ago I had to go to Washington DC for a conference. Simultaneously […]
Recovery is just a son of a bitch. 6 weeks they say… 6 weeks and you’ll be back to your routine… 6 weeks and you can “get back in shape”… 6 weeks and perhaps the pain will subside…. 6 weeks and then… What? Some kind of absolution from the horror that is brain surgery? 6 […]
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